Before I start this blog, it’s all about my personal breastfeeding experience so if that would make you uncomfortable, you might not want to read this. Also, I want to say that even though it was my choice to breastfeed, all mamas are wonderful no matter how they feed their little ones.
Breastfeeding is HARD! There are so many women who talk about breastfeeding like it was nothing for them, but my breastfeeding journey has been harder than pregnancy and maybe even birth itself! In saying that though, all bodies are different so my story might be completely different than yours.
From the beginning, I decided that I was going to try to breastfeed. So a few hours after my son was born, they made me try to get him to latch. My son was 6 lbs and 3 oz and really small so he was having a really hard time. They also told me that I was slightly inverted so my nipples didn’t jut out like they should. I just remember laying in the hospital bed with JJ in my lap crying, and I was trying to squeeze milk out by hand to drip in his mouth. The nipple shield they gave me was even too big for him.
Then they made me try the pump. I cried the first time using the pump because I sat there for 30 minutes without a single drop. The second time, I got about an ounce all together, and we were able to syringe feed that to JJ, and we were still trying to get him to latch too. It takes a while for babies to latch because they have never had to work for anything.
When we went home a couple days later, I got a pump from WIC. I kept trying to latch and syringe feed him, but he always acted hungry. Finally, I tried pumping and putting a couple ounces in a bottle, and he was finally satisfied. I cried because I felt like I had been starving him the whole time because he ate a lot from the bottle once he started going. Man I felt so bad.
Since bottle feeding worked best for us, I would just pump every 3 hours and bottle feed him. I usually pump 5 ounces from each side every time. I rarely tried to breastfeed anymore. Then I made a mistake.. I started wearing bras with nipple pads all the time. I would even try to go all night without pumping because I wouldn’t leak because of the pads. I thought I finally outsmarted having to pump every 3 or 4 hours.
One morning after not pumping for 8 hours, I woke up so sick. My chest was swollen, engorged and bright red. I also felt like I was getting the flu. I was so weak that I was having a hard time even taking care of my son. It turned out that I had gotten mastitis from not doing things right. I had to get an antibiotic to get better. There were some people telling me to switch to formula at that point, but I was too hard headed so I kept pumping and feeding.
As son as I felt better, the next week, I broke out with a terrible rash from an allergic reaction to laundry detergent! After a few days of nothing helping, I had to get a steroid shot and some prednisone, and the doctor said that I couldn’t breastfeed because of it. I didn’t have a choice though because it was what I needed to feel better. It worked out though because I contacted a friend that donates milk to the hospital, and she was able to give me enough for little man for a few days. I was so happy because I’d come too far to switch to formula now! I just had to pump and dump for about a week.
After I finished with the prednisone, I went back to our regular pump and bottle feed routine. Then last Wednesday something really random happened. Little man had just gotten his shots and wouldn’t stop crying so I went to the rocking chair to soothe him. When he wouldn’t calm down, I decided to try to latch him, and he latched! He breastfed like a pro, and it calmed him down so much. We’ve been able to breastfeed multiple times since then too!
I know this blog was long, but I wanted to write it too encourage mamas, and to tell them that they’re not alone in this struggle. It took me 2 months to get the hang of breastfeeding! If breastfeeding isn’t right for you or your baby, that’s perfectly fine too though. I wish all mamas the best health for themselves and their babies.
15 replies on “Breastfeeding Struggles And Success!”
Oh, tell me about it! When I had my first baby, I had no idea how to breastfeed and made tons of mistakes. The problem is that nobody really tells you how to prepare your breasts for breastfeeding. Now I’m pregnant with my second baby, due very soon, and I won’t make the same mistakes again.
Stories about other moms struggles are super helpful to hear for those of us that just could never get it to work! Thank you 🙂
Everyone’s journey is so different and hopefully this can help encourage other moms who are struggling! I breast fed all three of mine and I struggled in different ways with each. Ultimately I nursed each one for 1-2 years and am so glad I did.
YOU ARE AMAZING!! I loved reading your story because even though there were moments I felt so sorry for you, to read on about how you persevered no matter what was so inspiring. Go you Mama!!! x
Thank you sharing, I think it’s important to talk about the struggles you face when trying to breastfeed because it’s not always easy and it’s different for everyone. I was devastated with my first child because I desperately wanted to breastfeed. She would latch and on occasion I could feel the pull of milk but not often. She was fussy and kept acting like she was still hungry. She was also jaundice and almost had to go to the NICU (we had already been on a 24 hour watch after birth) so the pediatrician recommended supplementing with formula for a few days to help. She took to the bottle immediately and drank the formula in minutes. I cried harder than I had cried before because I felt horrible that I had been inadvertently starving her and didn’t know it. We continued on with the formula while I would try to nurse her and pump but even with her latched and “nursing” for 45 minutes she was still hungry. With pumping I couldn’t get even half an ounce in a 30 minute window and we realized after 5-6 different pumping sessions that I wasn’t producing milk. It was a really hard feeling to know that I couldn’t breastfeed my daughter like I wanted to, but she took well to formula and she’s been thriving ever since! In the end I can say that I tried the best I could, but there are challenges with breastfeeding that sometimes you can’t overcome. I’m really happy you were able to work through all of yours!
I’m glad your baby is getting what’s best for her! 😊
I did too find breastfeeding challenging and at the moment felt alone in my guilt of not being able to do so for a long time, after a while I figured this wasn’t working for me or my baby and moved on to the bottle, I was happy, my baby was happy and growing. That’s what matters!
Every mothers struggles is worth it! great job
Breastfeeding can be so difficult for so many mamas, but it’s so important to give it our best try! Good job, mama!
Love to hear breastfeeding success stories! It is a true struggle to get through and keeping head strong and knowing what is best for your baby is the best thing ever!
I’m with you here mama. Breastfeeding is hard. Some moms make it seem like the easiest thing. I didn’t breastfeed my first even though I wanted to but the struggle was real. My second was a natural but it was still a long learning process. Eventually you get the hang of it and it is beautiful. Both my kids are healthy so alls well that ends well.
I am so happy you shared your story. My son was born 6 lbs 8 oz and when down to 5 lbs so I was instructed to breast and formula feed. This meant using a syringe to feed him so that he learned to breastfeed. He had a hard time latching and it was so stressful. BUT it got better! There were many hard moments, but I was able to breastfeed him until he was 2! He is a healthy boy and I loved the experience. Now with my daughter who was just born I struggle to get her to take a bottle. At least this means no pumping for me but I feel like I can’t leave her with anyone for fear she will be hungry. At least she nurses really well for me. My point is that each baby and each mamas breastfeeding journey is different. It’s okay to want to stop, but I applaud all of us mamas who stick it out even when in pain or tired or wanting our bodies back. I feel like any way to feed baby is the best way, but thanks for sharing your experience.
Yes fed is best! ❤️ we are going on 9 months this Sunday and I love the journey!
I totally feel you with this! No one tells you how challenging breast feeding can be! Its so great to give yourself grace mama you are doing a wonderful job! Thanks so much for sharing and helping to encourage other mamas!
Thank you so much!